Talking, expressing stress
Acknowledging that we're stressed is becoming almost commonplace, and many of us do it willingly, but when it comes to describing how we feel and/or talking more deeply about our state of stress, we suddenly become less loquacious. Too much modesty? Fear of annoying the other person? Are we embarrassed by what we see as a weakness? We often prefer to keep our torments to ourselves.
And yet... putting words to what we're feeling allows us to distance ourselves and reduce or even eliminate our tensions (catharsis). Once our emotions have subsided, we can put things into perspective and change our perception of things. What's more, trying to explain a situation clearly to someone often helps us to clarify it for ourselves, and even to find solutions more easily.
When our stress becomes too great, when anxiety makes our daily lives burdensome, talking becomes essential to regain our bearings and peace of mind.
But to whom?First of all, someone close to you (family, friends, fellow students, etc.) with whom you feel comfortable, who isn't too stressed themselves (stress is eminently contagious!) and who can listen calmly, knowing that stress, bouts of blues or moments of panic are "normal" phenomena in times of blockages and sessions... and should therefore be put into perspective. |
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Sometimes, however, those close to us are not the best people to provide the support we need, simply because they are too close to us and too emotionally involved in our situation. In other words, they "suffer" from seeing us "suffer", and find it hard to stand back and support us with sufficient serenity. In this case, we can call on the services of a specially-trained person, who will bring an outside perspective to our situation and enable us to look at it from a different angle. The "shrink" is not the person who will say things for us, but he or she will help us to formulate our thoughts, to express those emotions which we tend to keep silent and which then become so heavy for us to bear. |
Some people, instead of confiding in others through the spoken word, tell their stories in writing, or use both techniques. By writing, they also try to put into words what they're feeling, and this helps them to put some distance, some space, between themselves and the emotions that sometimes overwhelm them. It's not a question of writing literature, of polishing one's style (although that's not forbidden), but rather of revealing oneself in complete intimacy and taking the time to take stock. The resulting relief can also be used to de-dramatize and face daily reality with new strength.
